Wii Review: Endless Oceanic

Against my better judgement (yeah, I'm a total game snob,) I decided to risk being bored and humiliated by purchasing "Endless Ocean" for the Wii. The following led me to purchase the game: Step 1. Read the Penny Arcade comic "Endless Oceanic." Step 2. Look the game up on Metacritic. Step 3. Think Step 4. Purchase... It is worth noting that Endless Ocean garnered a score of 72 out of 100 on Metacritic - pretty good.

The game is about, yeah, scuba diving. You're a diver on the an Island who is asked to perform several tasks for the head of a local marine research organization for Alfred Thorman. These tasks range from "topographical surveys" (as near as I can tell, getting in the water) to acting as a diving guide for several people who demand to see one particular fish. There's also a plot element centering around a mysterious species of aquatic life that has to do with a member of your "crew."

The one thing of note is that this is really two different games on one disc - one occurs on the boat and the other occurs in the water. The game that occurs on the boat is awful, nothing more, nothing less. The graphics are terrible, the jet ski noises are not believable, nor do they alter in volume as they drive away, nor does it create any ripples in the water. Further, the character you play emotes in very mechanical awkward motions that are completely unrealistic.

Under the water, the game is completely different. The one thing this game really has going for it is that it's almost like an exercise in zen - it is one of the most relaxing game experiences ever. The graphics are far superior - not quite up to par with this generation of systems, but still pretty alright (I would liken it to a PS2 game.) The game itself is almost like the traveling element in an MMO, which I think is kinda relaxing and monotonous as well. This is a very niche game, but if you're down to try something different and relaxing - something that's barely even a "game"- this game is something you'd like. I have played about 10 hours of the game, which was enough to finish the "plot" element, but the game, as near as I can tell, will continue for as long as you'd like to play it - which is kinda nice. Oh, one thing to note, the soundtrack goes well with the game... at first... but it gets old really fast. You're going to want to make sure you have a SD card reader to load MP3s on, which the game includes support for.

Graphics - 6
Music - 7
Sound Effects - 9
Originality - 8
Replay Value - 5
Overall Composite - 6.2